For this week’s post, I’m taking a look at of Tamlin from the A Court of Thorns and Roses Series.
I have been toying with the idea of writing this post of a couple of weeks, and I almost didn’t write it, but after seeing so many comments on social media that are supportive of Tamlin, it’s compelled me to do this.
I realize he is just a fictional character but it’s important to recognize his character portrays very real life abusive behaviors. I’m staggered by the sheer number of people who fail to see this. The worst of which are that he acts this way out of love which is simply not true. There even some people who blame Feyre for his behavior!
This book series has huge fandom and most of the people I have spoken to agree that Tamlin is abusive. So this post is for all the Tamlin Lovers out there who think his behavior is ok.
I’m going to start by listing the 7 typical personalities of the Abuser:
- The Bully
- The Headworker
- The Badfather
- The Jailer
- The King of the Castle
- The Sexual Controller
- The Persuader
Tamlin exhibits the traits 1, 5 & 6. These are the ones I’m going to look at in more detail:
Uses intimidation to control us, eg glares, shouts, smashes things, sulks
Examples of this;
We see this behavior right from beginning in ACOTAR, when Feyre begins to spend time with Lucian:
Whatever tentative truce we built that afternoon vanished at the dinner table. Tamlin was lounging in his usual seat, a long claw out and circling his goblet. It paused on the lip as soon as I entered, Lucien on my heels. His green eyes pinned me to the spot. Right. I’d brushed him off that morning, claiming I wanted to be alone. Tamlin slowly looked at Lucien, whose face had turned grave. “We went on a hunt,” Lucien said. “I heard,” Tamlin said roughly, glancing between us as we took our seats. “And did you have fun?” Slowly, his claw sank back into his flesh. Lucien didn’t answer, leaving it to me. Coward. I cleared my throat. “Sort of,” I said. “Did you catch anything?” Every word was clipped out. “No.” Lucien gave me a pointed cough, as if urging me to say more. But I had nothing to say. Tamlin stared at me for a long moment, then dug into his food, not all that interested in talking to me, either.
Not only is he sulking here he is also acting jealous. Jealousy has nothing to do with love; it’s a sign of possessiveness and lack of trust.
“You don’t get to speak to me like that. You promised you wouldn’t act this way.” “You have no idea what’s at risk—” “Don’t you talk down to me. Not after what I went through to get back here, to you. To our people. You think any of us are happy to be working with Hybern? You think I don’t see it in their faces? The question of whether I am worth the dishonor of it?” His breathing turned ragged again. Good, I wanted to urge him. Good. “You sold us out to get me back,” I said, low and cold. “You whored us out to Hybern. Forgive me if I am now trying to regain some of what we lost.” Claws slid free. A feral growl rippled out of him. “They hunted down and butchered those humans for sport,” I went on. “You might be willing to get on your knees for Hybern, but I certainly am not.” He exploded. Furniture splintered and went flying, windows cracked and shattered. And this time, I did not shield myself. The worktable slammed into me, throwing me against the bookshelf, and every place where flesh and bone met wood barked and ached. My knees slammed into the carpeted floor, and Tamlin was instantly in front of me, hands shaking
Here in a fit if rage her physical assaults her!